If you're going to learn how to save your relationship, you're going to have to learn how to change the way you interact with your partner.
The truth is your problems stem from the way you interact with the other person.
However, most people continue to use the same methods of interacting with their partner that they've always used.
They do this even though the methods they are using clearly are not working.
And of course, the evidence of this is that their relationship is not working.
So, if you want to learn how to save your relationship, you need to practice a new method of interacting with your partner, and practice it until it becomes a new habit.
Currently, you are using a method that doesn't work, and you are in a rut, unable to change the way you're interacting because your method has become a habit - a bad habit.
So here's what you need to do.
The next time you engage your partner in a conversation which starts to turn bad, or starts to evolve into conflict, break out of your old habit.
For example, if you are having a discussion about your finances, and your partner has become annoyed, you typically may have reacted to their annoyance by becoming annoyed yourself, or perhaps even becoming more annoyed than they are.
What tends to happen then is the conflict escalates to a higher and higher level until it turns into a major ordeal.
So this time, rather than getting annoyed at your partner's annoyance, you're going to change the whole dynamic of the situation.
When they become annoyed do something different; anything different.
You can smile, you can laugh, you can give them a hug, you can given the kiss, etc.
Anything that will change the mood of the moment.
Don't be sarcastic, don't be flip, and don't be phony.
Be genuine.
You can tell your partner that you're so grateful that they are in your life to handle the finances like they've been doing.
Or you can tell them that you know that it's tough, but they are extremely intelligent and you know that they'll be able to figure out, and then give them a big hug and a kiss and a smile.
I provide many more examples of this, and exactly how to accomplish this in my book.
For now, just practice on breaking out of your habit of reacting to your partner in such a manner which always results in a conflict.