Breaking up can be difficult to deal with, and often times it leads to some bad decisions as you attempt to find ways to win them back.
We've all been there, and the end result is never pretty.
Here are a few things you want to avoid while attempting to get your ex back.
Never keep score Now that you've broken up, suddenly you want to keep a mental note of all the things you've done for them.
This is a bad move as now it seems like you did them not because you loved them, but to have something to hold over their heads.
It makes them feel like you did it to control them, and it only pushes them away.
They remember the things you did, so take let them take it out of context by reminding them.
Never show up at their job Okay, so they're avoiding your phone calls.
Maybe you stopped by their house and no one came to the door, but you should never go to their place of business.
It isn't the time or place to discuss it, and you will put their job in jeopardy by doing so.
That's not going to help you win their heart back.
Leave their parents out of it No matter how long you two were together, and no matter how much the parents liked you when you were together...
they won't side with you on this.
The last thing you want to do is bring their parents into the mix.
If nothing else, it's giving them too much information about their child, information they may not want to know and that doesn't bode well for you.
Let's not bother the folks, okay? Show up unannounced I know it feels like the right thing to do at the time, but just showing up at their front door without a call is not only rude, you may walk in on something you don't want to see.
If they're not answering the phone, it's either because they aren't home or they're busy.
If they wanted to talk, they would have answered.
Showing up on their porch demanding answers is not the way to handle it.
Leave their new love out of it It's real easy to blame the person they're with now for your troubles, but chances are there were problems with your relationship long before this new person came around.
Don't compare yourself to them, or try to make a pros and cons list of why you're better than them.
If you do, it will just push your ex further and further away from you, and most times into the arms of someone else.
Let them figure it out for themselves.
The rebound Its okay to try to make the other person jealous by showing up with someone new, but don't take it too far.
Don't try to make them jealous that you do something that disrespects the relationship or makes them feel like the things you use to do with them weren't special.
I know it's easy to run into the arms of someone else when you're hurting, but if you go too far, you may not be able to bounce back from it.
Never smother them It seems like a good idea to write them love notes, send those cards and candy, call them all the time and profess your love for them, but it may be overkill.
In fact, it may be the reason they left in the first place.
The worst thing you can do is give them too much attention, so much that it ultimately pushes them away.
It's okay to let them know how you feel, but don't go overboard.