A simple but important question that you need to work on in any relationship, if it is to last, the answer is as individual as the people in the relationship, in other words you need to decide between yourselves how much space you both need in your relationship.
Some couples, like Linda and I, have a close relationship working as team both in our professional and private lives, it suites us and it is what we both need, other couples need to have more space with their relationship to make it work for them.
The process of balancing you relationship is a difficult process to begin and can be more difficult if you both have differing needs for the amount of personal space you need, as always compromise is king.
The challenge for you both is to give and take till you find the right balance to make you both happy.
There are two basic character types, who have widely differing needs for space in their relationships.
On the one hand there are people who like to be constantly with people all the time, co-workers, friends, family, partners and without this constant contact they feel alone, lonely, and in extreme cases they even feel neglected without this constant contact.
On the other hand you have people who value their own space highly and are happy to be on their own at work and play, they may for instance feel that too much contact is stressful and they need space to relax.
These are the two extremes and almost everybody is a mixture of both usually somewhere in the middle of the range, needing both together time and me time to relax and recharge.
The important thing is a soon as your relationship starts to get serious, you need to work out a pattern of compromise regarding your time together and how much me time you both need.
If you both are in the same half of the spectrum where you both need to be together most of the time or you need lots of me space, then it should be easy to work out you needs and have a happy relationship.
This is true to a lesser extent if you are both in the middle ground, it will need a little more compromise but in a loving pairing, respect for each others needs will allow you to make a happy relationship together.
The real problems come when you find, early in your relationship, that you both have totally different attitudes regarding the amount of space your relationship needs, then you have to sit down and make serious compromises.
I have to be honest here and say that in my experience this is one of the biggest hurdles to be crossed for most of the affected couples, where one needs a relationship with a lot of contact and feels neglected without it and the other finds this constant contact stifling and needs a lot of me space to cope with the stress it can cause.
Love will find a way, talk it over and above all be honest about your need for both space and contact in your relationship and work out framework to allow you both to be happy.
Honesty here is the key and a complete willingness to allow each other the space and contact that you both need, failure to do this early on will lead to two very unhappy people.
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