I was intending to take today off from the usual daily posting.
You know what it's like: "Hey! It's the end of the workweek.
I just did 18 hours at the office today!" Wheeeee! I can take a day or two off of all my obligations...
Yet, we never really do...
Maybe I'm the only one, but I doubt it.
There's the never ending "to do" list for work that preoccupies the brain during the off moments.
Why the h*ll am I thinking about work? This weekend, I was out enjoying one of the first warm and sunny days Wisconsin has to offer before the arctic comes back soon to pay us a 6 month visit.
Just working in the yard to get it cleaned up.
Spending time with my wife.
Burning old branches and wood in the fireplace out back and enjoying the smell and the fire as much as anything else except the warmth on my back...
Wait a minute: "The staffing web conference call is at 3pm tomorrow...
Where did I put that email with the link?" Arrgh! Where did that thought come from? Why does the brain DO that? I feel it's a product of evolution.
We're hard wired to find and see the problem, the threat.
That which is not the normal for the situation catches our eye, our thoughts, our preparedness.
We do not see the motionless animal in the forest, but we see the moving one.
If we try to scan the sky for a plane, it is hard to find, but stare at a point in space, and it's motion triggers our sense of sight and we see what was there all along.
I sort of "got it" when I was exercising this morning.
I was doing my crunches and staring at the same point in the ceiling that I always do: a small gouge, less than 1/2" across, that is always right above my head when I am on the mat it the basement workout room.
Why that spot? I never thought about it before, but it's the only thing that not the same about the ceiling.
It's not right, it's the most imperfect thing I can see and focus on "in the moment".
We are attracted to the problems, the issues, the imperfections of life.
A survivalist leftover from our ancestors? See the threat and avoid it? That worked in the past.
But why do we hold onto it? I need to consult a sociologist, but it's 1:00 a.
m..
Better hold that call until morning.
If we would just stop and think about all that is right with our world, all that we have been fortunate to receive, all that which we have created, how would we feel? I picture how I felt when building that basement workout room.
I had never attempted to build a finished basement.
I didn't have any natural talent, either, I can assure you.
Yet, it got done.
It looked great.
I was very proud of what I had accomplished, and vowed to never tackle any "home improvement" project that big ever, ever again...
Now, when I use it, I focus all of my attention on the 1/2" by 1/2 " imperfection, instead of the 700 square feet of what is good and correct.
"What I am doing? I do that with everything in my life.
" I can be positive.
I know that I need to focus on what I want, not what I don't want.
I know that I have the power to do anything I sent my mind to do.
So, why is it a struggle? I need that sociologist's number.
Or, perhaps a psychiatrist? So, I finally "got it.
" While I was wondering, worrying, focusing on what was wrong with focusing on what was wrong, I realized the inherent stupidity.
And, uselessness.
And, pointlessness.
Let go.
Just let it go.
Be happy for what "is".
"Is" in this moment.
Remember: you are a stronger and more powerful person than you think you are.
You can do anything.
So don't fight it.
Give in to it.
We hate giving up control.
At least I know I do.
Yet, how satisfying is controlling worry and control unhappiness? There is little difference, however, between "you don't have to do anything, just be happy nowl" and "everything is a disaster, so why bother doing anything" mentalities.
In both circumstances nothing happens.
We must add action into the happiness equation.
That is why you always hear people say "follow your bliss" or "follow your passion.
" This is the call to action.
The path from happiness to passion IS action.
It is the path.
We must walk it.
I am no longer "blue" at heart.
I have resonated with my abilities and become, once again, strong in my faith.
I can do anything.
My higher power affords me every opportunity.
My past experiences enable me.
I still want to fix that d*mn spot in the ceiling downstairs, but certainly not as much as I wanted to share this with you.
May you find your peace today, as well.