I respect law enforcement..
..
most of the time.
When you consider detectives who track down murderers and rapists, or the DEA agents to bust dangerous drug rings, I am of the opinion that these guys are not paid nearly enough.
But when it comes to the average street cop, it's another story.
It isn't crime fighting to sit in a parked car for hours on end with a radar gun, picking off unsuspecting motorists who in all likelihood are speeding out of ignorance, not any flagrant desire to break the law.
As someone who spent years driving considerable distances, at all times of day and night, I can assure you that if you actually get out and move around, you will see more than your share of purposeful law breaking, more than enough to fill whatever quota the chief handed down during roll call.
So how do you avoid such speed traps? Well, the obvious answer is "don't speed".
Seems simple enough, but the fact is that we all have lapses in concentration, we all look down occasionally and notice that we have allowed our speed to creep up beyond what would be considered acceptable, and if that happens to occur when you're in the crosshairs of a radar gun, well, your party is over.
Do your best to observe the posted speed limits and keep it no more than 5 MPH over (although in some small town jurisdictions, ANY overage can result in those gorgeous blue lights flashing in your rear-view mirror).
Watch your speed coming downhill, as that always makes a way for you to inadvertently speed up.
Rounding curves may be especially tricky, as police and state troopers love to take advantage of the opportunity to remain unseen until it is too late.
Get familiar with the speed limits for whatever area or state you may be visiting.
Knowing expectations beforehand could spare you some heartache.
There are also numerous web sites devoted to speed traps.
Print off a list of dangerous areas along the route you intend to take, and watch yourself accordingly.
Be advised that these lists are by no means exhaustive, and new speed traps can pop up anywhere at any time.
Buy yourself a radar gun.
This is one product where it is advised that you do not bargain hunt.
Be prepared to pay upwards of $500 for the latest and most up to date radar detection technology.
Law enforcement works overtime to stay one step ahead of radar guns, so you'll want the best the market has to offer.
You do not want to see blue lights behind you and have a radar gun that never gave so much as a beep to warn you.
You can also download apps for your phone that can provide up to the minute notifications on speed traps nationwide.
Swim in schools.
Much like fish avoid getting snapped up by sharks by staying closely clumped together in schools, do your best to fall in with other groups of cars.
You're much less likely to stand out and be targeted, especially if you drive a nondescript vehicle (that's the wisdom anyway, I drove a red Camaro for five years with nary a warning, but was pulled over five times in a white mini van, go figure).
Don't be the first or the last car in line...
that's begging for trouble.
Life In The Fast Lane.
Not a good idea.
Use the fast lane for passing, but don't hang out there for extended periods.
Doing so only makes you a prime target, as police routinely train their radar guns on the fast lanes.
Know your enemy and be able to identify him.
Police cars aren't known for subtlety, what with flashing blue lights, enormous graphics or lettering, and the ubiquitous battering ram on the front bumper, but even unmarked cars are usually identifiable.
They will be mid sized or larger sedans, often with glass tinted very dark (to obscure dashboard mounted lights and cameras), as well as uncharacteristically larger than average black wall tires.
Think of something the Men In Black might drive and you've got a pretty good idea of what to look for.
Basically, exercise some common sense, be aware of your surroundings, and watch your actions at all times.
A speeding ticket is one of the most useless things you can get.
It doesn't make the roads safer; all it does is generate revenue for local, county, or state government.
Don't become an unwilling contributor.