All these troubles and pain started with the Break Up. At first there is no way to fully understand what happened and how things went that way. There is no need for you to completely understand all that at once. The emotional impact of the break up is one big thing to deal with to handle and put every broken piece back. The break up happened for many reasons. Whether it's your fault of your partner's, it doesn't really matter right now. Your emotion is speaking up so just let it out in the open before you make some sense of what's next.
Tip #1: Dissolve Time Pressure. After the break up, do not continue freaking out. If you want to win your ex back then do not focus on the immediate reaction. There is no ticking clock or sands of time that if it runs out, you lose the love of your life forever. Hours don't matter and days or weeks are not that big of deal. Time is not your enemy but your ally.
Tip #2: The will to Accept. The break up happened whether you deny it or don't believe it, it did happen. It is very important that you accept the break up in order to win your ex back. Yes, you need to let that painful event slide. You will be able to deal with the situation better or even at your best if you have accepted the break up. Cope with it and accept it because it is the second step and one of the most essential move to win your ex back.
Tip #3: Back to Life. While you let time pass by without harassing or begging to reconcile, send a very short note or brief call to your ex saying, you're okay with the break up and you agree that it might be the best thing for the both of you. That's only it and you must keep it very short. After that, focus on yourself. Get a makeover, discover the new you and be the person you always dreamed to be. No one is stopping you but rather someone is wishing you to do that. So go ahead and bring some life back in you.
Tip #4: Close Doors Behind to Open New Ones. Leave all the painstaking arguments, fights, and all the horrible things in your relationship behind and never open that door again. Face a new door and open it with all your best. Keep a friendly communication with your ex. Share bits of exciting things in your life. Maintain mystery and build up anticipation. Do not over share to win your ex back into your life.
Tip #5: The Big Change to a Big Chance. Most ex-lovers get jealous when they see their former partner happier, more attractive, and more exciting. Make big changes in your life in natural ways, you will be surprised to get to know yourself more once you decide to be the best you. Keep in touch with your ex and to win your ex back, entertain friendly get together or friendly dates but do not jump in to romantic dates instantly.
Tip #6: Say no to D©j  Vu. Do not make the same mistakes twice. If you hang out with your ex more frequently, do not give in to physical contact easily. Make sure that you establish to your ex that you are serious and you are not easy to get. If surprisingly your ex talks about getting back or starting over, your big door of second chance just opened and do not let things happen twice.
Tip #7: Love Life. Love your life and everyone in it but love yourself first. Respect yourself; maintain your integrity, and principles in life that makes you happy. When you value your life, everyone in it will value you. Living a happy life is the secret to all successful and strong relationships.