My story is one of dismal failure.
It is so sad I suggest you get a box of tissues, as you will doubtless be in tears after reading this heart rending story of a once well balanced, normal individual who went stark raving mad trying to get filthy rich on the internet.
Yes friends, this is how I went from a normal beer guzzlin' cowboy with pickup truck, a dog, a gun and a fancy woman, to a stark raving mad wealthy affiliate sitting in front of an empty word document with drool running down my chin.
Anyone Can Succeed.
Earn Money At Home! There is a secret organization out there.
By, "out there," I mean inside of your computer there are people who make up that group called "out there.
" I think you see what I mean..
This group is responsible for perpetuating the myth that even a decent redneck living southeast of Jackson Wyoming in a sheep camp can get crazy rich.
It makes me itch when I think to hard about all this.
Anyway, they (them) come out of the computers and into your house like they are regulars from this side of reality and start messin' with you.
In my case they told me that maybe I could do better for myself.
Maybe living in a tick infested sheep camp wasn't the best life after all.
Well, you know, it got me thinking.
Time they got done with me, my poor head was spinning.
They finally left and curious, I trailed them to a fancy house.
They went right inside and as I peeked in the window they just got smaller and smaller.
They one by one walked into the screen of laptop sitting on the table.
I think the one fellow saw me as he, being the last one to walk in to that computer, was pointing at the window where I was, but it didn't seem real 'cause they were all inside of that laptop computer.
I went home, but somehow I was changed.
Getting Started Is Easy And It Will Not Cost You A Thing.
I stuck to my cowboy ways for a spell but they (them) came back a few more times and I finally come to realize that the cowboy way just wasn't good enough any more.
I'd tell you more about what they said and done, but I don't want you thinking I'm goofy or something.
All you need to get rich on the internet is a laptop computer.
I did not have one, so I sold my pickup and got me real good one.
The fellow that sold it to me was mighty pleased to hear I was gonna be rich soon and said to be sure to come back.
Did I mention that my occupation up till then was being a hillbilly? I could not figure out how to make the thing work so I had to sell my dog and guns to get trained on how to use it.
I was finally able to look inside the screen and saw them (they) inside.
They seemed real happy.
I simply had no way of knowing that this was the first step in becoming a mad wealthy affiliate.
Choose A Niche, Get A Domain, And Rake In The Dough.
The people who come at night (them) told me that all I had to do was choose a niche, go to daddy, get a domain name, and in no time at all I would be living the life I had always dreamed of.
This made me a little uncomfortable, because when your living in a sleeping bag, shooting rattlesnakes and drinking warm beer, that is all you dream about.
I found an affiliate link for revolvers, as I know some about shooting at stuff, then I went and asked my daddy for a domain name and that's when the trouble started.
My daddy did not know anything about domain names, what's more, he seemed to think that the lead paint I ate off the window sills as a child was making my thinking "different".
That's about all I recollect of the visit 'cause when my dad can't figure out what to say, he just punches me in the head.
That night I hitched a ride to the rest stop and plugged in my laptop and they (them) explained that GoDaddy was the name of a web site where you chose a name for your site and that I was pathetic.
Never Give Up, Listen To The Voices In Your Head.
That was three months ago and since then I have written my first article to drive traffic to my new website.
I will succeed.
I'll show all of them (they), and maybe you.
I got me a nice place up above the rest area hid in the rocks.
The rest area has free Wi-Fi so I can get online whenever I want and there's always lots of things in the garbage cans, so I get plenty to eat.
I have worked hard to get this far with my article marketing efforts and realize that others have not been as fortunate as I to find this high level of success.
So as I sit here under the stars in my underwear and cowboy hat visiting with the little people in my laptop.
I overhear a traveler, "Isn't this where they sighted the mad wealthy affiliate?" I smile to myself.
No one can see me now because I'm invisible, and I'm filthy rich...