I got a troubling text from a friend the other day. He wrote me a message saying he needed help dealing with the people. So I asked him: "whch pple?"

"Jst evryone," he texted me back. Confused, I asked for more details, "why everyone?"

He replied, "please call back." I hesitated, but remembering my obligations, I decided to call back—I mean I am supposed to be a friend, a counselor, a consultant, a doctor . . .

Here was his story--at least his side of it:

First, he apologized for sending me a "please call back." He said he could not afford airtime to call me himself because of the downward spiral his life was now in . . .

He said that his problems started with rumors that there would be lay-offs at work.  He said his first mistake was NOT sharing these rumors, which puzzled me because I believe that gossip or rumor mongering is bad. But he explained that he should have shared the rumors with his wife and family. Why? Friends, because the rumors quickly turned into grim reality . . .

He was retrenched. As a result, he couldn't pay his mortgage. In a matter of weeks, he got a foreclosure notice, and so the spiral went on . . .

But he soon realized these were far from his biggest problems. First were feelings of blame. It took him days to disclose to his family that he had received the dreaded letter at work, so when the foreclosure notice came this week, his family was shocked. They hadn't had a chance to absorb the news of his job loss.

Now he's confronted with feelings of shame—he is so embarrassed, he can't face the public. So when he came to me the other day, he needed help dealing with the people first: his family and the rest of us.

The whole world is in financial turmoil—not just the people on Wall Street. And while news of this drama was playing out on the news, my friend was busy watching sports on pay-per-view—now he's another statistic. The truth is people often feel like they are different and somehow immune to the hard facts of the recession.

For anyone facing bankruptcy, foreclosure, or job loss, facing the people (both family and the community) can be the most difficult challenge. In situations like these, people feel embarrassed, overwhelmed, and unsure how to answer all the questions that inevitably come. But there are things you can do to overcome this challenge. Here are my suggestions.

1. Determine the REAL Problem

Firstly (ideally in the first few days), anyone facing a situation like this should engage in intellectualization to find out what his or her main problem really is. When my friend explained his problem, I immediately thought he was missing the point. What do you think?

2. Quantify the Problem

When I talked to my friend, I told him he should quantify his problem. One sure way to accomplish this is to look at how this crisis in his life measures on the Social Readjustment Rating Scale found in many psychology and stress books. On this scale, your crisis is given a score based on how much it would affect your life. This score is based on studies that were done around the world on people in similar situations and was shown to be a reliable and consistent way to measure human social crisis.

3. Determine Your Assets, and Use Them

The next step is to capitalize and build on your personality. I told my friend he could take a quick but detailed test available on www.personality100.com. This could help him recognize his strengths as a person, which he could use to fight any obstacles on his way to recovery.

4. Address Your Feelings

He should certainly practice repression;this should take care of his feelings of shame. This strategy allows you to be less clouded in your thinking so that rational thinking guides your decisions. Again, most psychology and well-written stress books should have a good explanation on how to employ this tactic.

5. Make a Plan

And last but not least, anyone facing job loss, bankruptcy, or foreclosure should resort to regression and craft short-term and long-term life goals. Making a plan, and taking action to execute it, will leave you feeling empowered with solutions, instead of trapped by complications.

Coping with Your Financial Stress

Financial problems may feel like the end of the world, but they really aren't. If you find yourself in a problematic situation like my friend, you can use these five steps to overcome embarrassment and put your life on a new path to success!