Not everyone who meets and falls in love will be the same age.
The May-December romance has been around for as long as there have been men and women.
When there is a significant age gap between two people, however, it can pose certain challenges for the relationship.
Many wonder, can May-December marriages really work? Have you ever heard the phrase "variety is the spice of life"? What about "familiarity breeds contempt"? For some people there is a special appeal to dating someone who is different than their peers.
It might be a younger woman who enjoys the maturity and sophistication of a man ten or even twenty years her senior.
It could be the older man who likes the freshness and vitality of a young woman.
Then too, a younger mate whether male or female is less likely to come with the same type of emotional baggage (ie, divorce, failed relationships, children) as the peer of a person in his or her 40s.
Certainly the physical beauty of a younger spouse can also be part of the attraction in our youth-driven culture.
Whatever sparked the May-December romance, there will always be some things which are unique to this type of relationship.
It would be naive to think that after the excitement of picking out fabulous wedding gowns and sets of bridal jewelry, the newlyweds will just settle into a perfect new life together.
Any marriage may have some conflict, and when there is a significant generation gap, there is the potential for more conflict to arise.
Will the younger spouse want to go to a new nightclub every weekend, while the older one no longer has the energy (or interest) to dance until dawn? Will the younger spouse end up feeling stifled if the older one insists that sedate plays and restaurants are the best places to go out? What might seem fresh and exciting while dating can grow old quickly, if it is not really your taste.
Another potential issue in May-December marriages is children, especially if the woman is the older partner.
Even if a young husband claims to have no interest in having kids, what if he changes his mind five years into the marriage when it is too late for the wife to bear children? In the reverse situation, what if the older husband has already raised his kids, and wants to travel the world instead of settling down to have another baby? This is an issue that can crop up in any marriage of course, but it is more likely to become a problem when the spouses are in very different phases of their lives.
Societal disapproval can also put a strain on a May-December marriage.
This can be especially true if one partner is seen as old enough to be the other one's parent.
When the older spouse has grown children who are around the same age as the younger spouse, it is very common for the family to disapprove.
The stigma can be even worse when the wife is the older one.
After all, how many times can one be called a "cougar" before it gets old? The whole situation gets even dicier if one person used to be the other one's superior in a workplace.
None of this is to say that May-December marriages cannot work out.
Plenty have turned into long and happy marriages, despite what the naysayers thought in the beginning.
It is just a word of caution to carefully consider all of the long term possibilities of what can happen when two people of different ages marry.
Like any marriage, a May-December relationship will boil down to a willingness to put in the work after the church bells have rung, the bridal gowns and jewelry sets have been packed away, and the honeymoon is over.
Best of luck to you all!