Kim Kardashian - Her Butt and Her Terrible Top Knot

Kim Kardashian tried to "break the internet" with a greasy naked photo shoot that appeared in Paper Magazine. As if the publicity stunt wasn't enough to make your eyes roll, the one-upping continued with a full frontal nude photo from the same shoot. You can see all that nonsense here, that is, if you've somehow missed the over saturation of Kim's butt all over the internet. If the photos themselves weren't annoying enough (and some claiming racially insulting), her top knot (that rivaled Cindy Lou Who from Whoville) was cringe worthy at best, and gave me pause to never wear my hair in one of my favorite styles again.

But alas, I remembered, that the world does not revolve around Kim Kardashian, her butt, or her hair (gasp!). So, let's take a moment, save your eyes, and turn your attention to real inspiring top knots. From red carpet chic to yoga pants Saturdays, these 9 celebrity top knot hairstyles out shined Kim Kardashian's by a long shot. Oh, and no one's naked or greasy, so that's a plus. You're welcome.

Jennifer Lopez's High and Tight Top Knot

Jennifer Lopez is no stranger to a great top knot. This sleek and tight style is achieved by winding the hair tight on the top of the head and securing with bobby pins. While simple, it makes a bold statement and lets your makeup do all the talking.

Gwen Stefani's Fun and Edgy Top Knot

Gwen Stefani's version of the top knot screams "Gwen". It's edgy and fun and not too complicated. Literally tying your pony tail in a knot and securing with pins is the best way to achieve a look like this. Make sure your hair is flat ironed well first.

Jennifer Lawrence's Soft and Effortless Top Knot

Who doesn't love Jennifer Lawrence and just about all of her hair styles. This top knot is a little loose and uncomplicated. A twist of your hair tie in the right direction is really all it takes to achieve a look like this. Don't forget to secure it down with a few bobby pins, and a good spray with a humidity resistant hair spray will help keep fly-a-ways under control.

Cindi Lauper's 80's Throwback Top Knot

I would expect nothing less from Cindi Lauper than this 80's inspired messy top knot that sits uniquely at the front of her hairline. A style like this may take some elbow grease, some good texture paste, and an attitude to go with it.

Bella Thorne's Bold Fringe Top Knot

This beautifully crafted top knot on Belle Thorne is easier than it looks. Tie your hair up into a pony tail and then wrap your hair around the base of your pony tail in one clock-wise direction (or counter-clockwise, it really doesn't matter). Secure the ends to the base of the pony tail with pins. I love how Bella's heavy fringe adds a little glamor to her style, while the wispy pieces around her face keep it light.

Jessica Alba's Braided Top Knot

Jessica Alba shakes up the top knot with a french braid that starts at the nape of her neck and travels up to the top of her head. This upside-down braid is best achieved with a little help from a friend, but if you're a proficient braider, tipping your head upside down and braiding up can yield the same result. Just do a better job and hiding your bobby pins than Alba's stylist did.

Katharine McPhee's Curly Tousled Top Knot

Curly hair makes an excellent top knot, as Katharine McPhee shows us with this tousled top knot. Dry your hair with a diffuser for big texture and maximum curl before creating this top knot hairstyle.

Sleek and edgy come together with Kelly Osbourne's ballerina chic top knot. A great blow out before styling your hair into this kind of knot is the key to keeping fly-a-ways at bay and a smooth shiny look that will last all night long. Kelly's fringe is the perfect way to set this hairstyle off with perfection.

Rachel McAdams may have been on the red carpet with this top not, but this looks easy like Sunday morning to me. Either way, a loosly pulled up top knot, secured and set off with a head band can easily go from work, to yoga, to dinner, and back to your couch without ever changing a thing.